5 not-so-basic facts about you.
- I think a lot before I fall asleep. That hasn’t been happening recently, because I’m usually too exhausted by the time my head hits the pillow. But usually I lie in bed for half an hour, in the dark, listening to the cicatas and the occassional car passing by. I think about the stuff that happened during the day, the things that I’m grateful for, the things that I did wrong, the things that I should do tomorrow. It’s the most peaceful time of the day to me because everyone else in the house is asleep, and the moment is mine.
- I cry easily. I cry watching movies, even the cheesiest ones. I cry when I’m arguing with someone or telling someone off, because I don’t like hurting people (even if they may be in the wrong). I cry when terrible things happen in the world. I cry when I overthink, and I cry when I’m judging myself. But I also think it’s healthy to let your emotions out, and it reminds me that I still care.
- I don’t like making choices. I like having plenty of options and then making a decision at the last minute because I’m forced to do so - even if this means more trouble now. Subject selections are the prime example. I chose the so called Asian Suicidal Five subjects for HSC even though I hated science, just in case I changed my mind and wanted to pursue the science or medical field. I chose a Media/Government/Law degree so I can go into any of the areas and not be constricted. It extends to every decision that I make in life.
- I love playing the piano. Like any other Asian kid, I grew up with it and I’ve wanted to give it up so many times. It wasn’t until Grade 6 that I started to really love it. It was good for destressing, for taking your mind off everything as you sit with your back to the world, for strengthening your fingers. I was hardly the best technical player, and hardly gifted - but I loved that it could be such an emotional instrument. The very moment that you play a piece right, and you can just feel that it is right - that moment is more satisfying than winning eisteddfods or getting a diploma. I play the piano so I can achieve that very moment.
- I’ve thought about dying.
